Blindness...
If there's one sense that I do not wanna lose... it's sense of sight.
I was blinded for 2 days before back in my college days. Was the catcher for a game of Captain's ball (boy.. played so much of dat) and my fren was the keeper. Being the nice fren that he was, he tried to block a ball coming towards me but his index finger went into my right eye instead. The fingernail scratched part of my pupil and I couldn't open my eyes for 2 days bcos it hurt when I did. For that 2 days I was moving around my house by feeling wat was around me. I wanted to see but I couldn't. That was when I decided I'd never ever want to be blind.
It was very frustrating to be blind... I knew I'd be fine in a few days' time, but I cannot imagine it'd be like to lose my sight permanently. Honestly, I'd cry for a few days and feel depressed. How long before I'd pick myself up again? Well.. I seriously don't know. Imagine not being able to see how your bed looks like, not to be able to capture the beauty of your loved one with your eyes, not even be able to see how a butterfly flutters.
It might not be as bad, but I think being blinded in terms of wat to do wif life is really tough too. Searching in the dark... not knowing which way is the best to go. I've begun to think if I'm wasting my youth away in this land called Melbourne. It really feels like there is so much more I can enjoy back home.. I don't want to make a mistake by staying here and lose out on things like job stability and a clear sense of direction in life. Ya, God knows the plans He has for us,.. but what if we chose 2nd best thinking it's the best? It's not the best feeling when u know ur peers are getting married, getting promotions.. have savings that are like 100 times more than urs. I'm getting worried that I might miss the boat. Sorry if you're thinking "Willie you think too much". I cannot help it, this is my responsibility.. to make wise decisions in life.
I need a clear direction from You Lord. Don't leave me hanging anymore. I'm getting tired of holding on to a piece of string. I need to be reminded of things that I remind others of. I need to live out Your promises. I need to scream ARGHHHHHH!!!!!
WillZ
I was blinded for 2 days before back in my college days. Was the catcher for a game of Captain's ball (boy.. played so much of dat) and my fren was the keeper. Being the nice fren that he was, he tried to block a ball coming towards me but his index finger went into my right eye instead. The fingernail scratched part of my pupil and I couldn't open my eyes for 2 days bcos it hurt when I did. For that 2 days I was moving around my house by feeling wat was around me. I wanted to see but I couldn't. That was when I decided I'd never ever want to be blind.
It was very frustrating to be blind... I knew I'd be fine in a few days' time, but I cannot imagine it'd be like to lose my sight permanently. Honestly, I'd cry for a few days and feel depressed. How long before I'd pick myself up again? Well.. I seriously don't know. Imagine not being able to see how your bed looks like, not to be able to capture the beauty of your loved one with your eyes, not even be able to see how a butterfly flutters.
It might not be as bad, but I think being blinded in terms of wat to do wif life is really tough too. Searching in the dark... not knowing which way is the best to go. I've begun to think if I'm wasting my youth away in this land called Melbourne. It really feels like there is so much more I can enjoy back home.. I don't want to make a mistake by staying here and lose out on things like job stability and a clear sense of direction in life. Ya, God knows the plans He has for us,.. but what if we chose 2nd best thinking it's the best? It's not the best feeling when u know ur peers are getting married, getting promotions.. have savings that are like 100 times more than urs. I'm getting worried that I might miss the boat. Sorry if you're thinking "Willie you think too much". I cannot help it, this is my responsibility.. to make wise decisions in life.
I need a clear direction from You Lord. Don't leave me hanging anymore. I'm getting tired of holding on to a piece of string. I need to be reminded of things that I remind others of. I need to live out Your promises. I need to scream ARGHHHHHH!!!!!
WillZ
2 Comments:
At 12:29 PM,
teng said…
Bro, I seriously believe you are not wasting your time (or youthful times as you call it). I'm sure many ppl can testify that you've been a great friend. Think of every decision you make now as being positive and ordained by God. If He did not approve it, you wld hv gotten a sign much earlier.
At 2:45 PM,
WillZ said…
Thanks for dat. Will be talking to Ted about some church stuff Friday morning. Hopefully that will shed some light on the direction I can head towards in the few years to come. The process of head knowledge -> heart knowledge.
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